Yupp!

Finally it’s a dog’s life. You are in Germany and you don’t have to pay taxes. Additionally you get to travel on superfast ICEs and Thalys and TGVs and Eurostars, and can reserve yourself a seat for free. This, not counting your free grooming, food supply and the yappy dog biscuits for which an entire supermarket dog section is dedicated. Yuppy!

I am still not sure whether you can fly, but I think within Europe you are in enuough numbers to deserve this right even (a reservation if you don’t add up). Next time, don’t forget to take out a dog movement for demanding the same.

I am happily climbing down the stairs, from one platform to the next when I suddenly find a very big you beside me, walking peacefully along. (I sometimes wonder, don’t you have a damn problem in life?) I take the liberty to pass a gentle unintentional hand-brush past your exquisite and tempting butt. You look back, yapping in bewilderment. I hurriedly pretend ignorance (there is a swarm of people moving with us), and assume Sumedh Rishbud made the mistaken touch. You give him an angry yap before you are pulled away by your attendant in another direction.

But this is not all. When I am travelling to France and trying to find an empty seat closest to those of my friends, I spot this one seat next to a nice old lady and am contemplating asking her, when you decide to climb up and snuggle up to a deep sleep. And when I sit on the ally and look ahead, I see a big yapping head sticking out. Of course, you are too big to fit into the leg-space of two seats. And I always have to walk carefully in market places and city squares for fear of treading on a tiny you.

Of course, your social life can put even my once-a-week-rendezvous-at-different-parts-of-europe to shame. On a daily basis you meet up your friends and foes with yelps and barks (I can never say which is friendly and which is menancing, for you sure have a high degree of equality amongst yourselves) when you are taken out by your attendants to shit on any grassy lawns you like. Within the length offered by your dog-belts, you sniff and snuggle with your mates. Age, sex, color, size - no bar. And of course, you are members of various yupping and yapping communities where you meet up every evening and howl yourself sick while your attendants give you privacy. As long as you are pulled back, the tiniest of you dares to bark even at the mightiest Alsatian. I again complement you on your totally casteless, division-less, size-less society.

I cant help noticing the gracefulness with which you pay your invocation with one raised paw to every structure, standing taller than you. And how you stay so forlorn and quiet when you travel. And how you neglect me when you pass me, I being a dedicated lover of your breed and cats. (Not to mention swans, but I have become wary of them after one swan held me ransom till I had feed it the entire piece of cake I had).

And you can’t help beaming with pride when you see that there is a separate train ticket package for your travel, a separate row of ticket buttons altogether for you, and doggie-chains humans nowadays love to wear on their necks, marking world cup, or similar events. You are even mentioned in more places than you would care for – there is a big red line on you at Eiffel tower, you are refused entry in Olympic towers, and factory shop-floors, but the day will soon be there when by force of your sheer strength you will be yapping all the way to the Eiffel top to gloriously spray on fellow human beings below.

And when you do that, do remember we human beings totally love you and are in awe of you. We pledge human bondage to you for the rest of your life.